10:30 p.m.

[ Where has all my bitchy gone? ]

Today has been wonderful but left me completely and utterly exhausted. After my brother (note: I didn't refer to him as Bro-Zilla this time - see? I'm getting better), left to get his baby girly I hung out with the babies until they fell asleep then took a few minutes to *gasp!* read something. Yup, I'm getting all weird now. Seriously I should have finished that damn book by thanksgiving but the only time I get to read is when I'm in the waiting room of a doctor's / therapist's office. Sad, no?

Actually...yes.

Especially since I used to live to read the next Stephen King release. As of now I'm about three releases behind.

Shame on my busy ass.

Anyway, John had therapy today so the babies and I had a nice ride out taking him to his appointment then bringing him home. We all enjoyed that. Then afterwards John wanted to come home rather then go to his dad's house, which of course made me happy. Speaking of whom, FF called here this evening sounding pissed and said, "Let me talk to Johnathan," without even bothering to say hello first.

Methinks he art an asshole. Yes, he is indeed a mighty sphincter.

Perhaps he ran into a really great looking woman that told him to eat shit.

Actually, Mother Teresa would have told him to eat shit.

Anyway, I let it go. It's not my fault that he's rude and terminally ill-bred and today I won't let it be my problem.

Yes, I know tonight's entry is without my usual outrage and venom but I actually feel pretty good right now. It's been a decent few days. No one knows how to enjoy a peaceful time better than screwed up people because we know they are very short-lived indeed. But for the first time in a long time I'm not anticipating a tragedy at the end of the big happy, just a sort of lull, maybe some quiet boredom.

Wow...that sure doesn't sound much like the cynical, panicky, angsty, negative bitch that is me.

I'm off to watch Blow with John. It's got Johnny Depp playing a cocaine dealer. Looks pretty interesting.

Oh, one more thing. I had an odd, nearly-nirvana moment today. I was on the way to get John and the station I was listening to played Down On the Corner, Don't Fear the Reaper and Take It Easy in a row. I almost dissolved into a big drippy puddle of liquid happiness in the driver's seat. Is that normal?