I don't know why but I've always had a thing for bad tv.

According to my brother I have a generalized taste for shit, but it does seem to reflect more in my tv viewing choices than in any other part of my life. I think people who say tv rots your brain are just trying to sound like intellectual snobs because there are so many good things out there in electronic la-la land; things like public television and lots of educational programming. I love educational tv, but I'm also into reality tv and the Jerry Springer show.

The latest addition to the bad tv hall of fame is the craptacular soap Passions. This has to be one of the all-time lamest shows in the history of broadcasting. The writing is derivative and the storylines not what you generally expect from daytime tv. What sets it apart from standard soap fare are plots that include the kidnapping and soon-to-be murder of a pregnant woman in order to steal her baby and the general mischief making of a three hundred year old witch. Yipe. This is All my children that live in a trailer park, or As the white trash world turns.

The writing, though less than good, pales in comparison to the suckfest that is the acting. Not all of the actors are bad, but there is mucho slinging of ham, the worst offender being the old lady with the bad grey wig and the orangutan who plays Beth's mother. She has a voice like a tuba and oddly enough, while almost painful to watch, is funny as hell.

Admittedly, the tall chick who plays Charlie (another woman with a baritone), scares the shit out of me. She's comes off like a hardcore butch Bonnie Parker, a psycho gun fancier with a grudge against blondes.

To watch this show requires a nearly childlike ability to suspend disbelief, just because of the sheer outrageousness of some of it.

I know it sucks, I can't believe how bad it is or how long it has been on in spite of it's many shortcomings, yet I love it.

I've been hooked for about a week. This show is one of the best examples I could ever give of something that is absolutely the worst performing at it's absolute best. I really can't say why it's so compelling but I can't pull myself away from it. It's like watching a devastating wreck involving a truck that's hauling gasoline and an ambulance. You just can't look away even though you really want to.

Perhaps there's some kind of subliminal messaging involved. The same with Dr. Phil because I'm hooked on that now too.

Maybe my brother is right. I have a well defined taste for shit.

But I haven't gotten hooked on anything on WB yet so perhaps there's hope for me.

Hey, even I have my standards.