From my other journal, dated July 17, 2002

See?

I am 60% Tortured Artist

Art is significant in my life, people are scum but I have the capicity to deal with it. Give it a few more years and I will either forget about art or hate the world.

Take the Tortured Artist Test at fuali.com

I'm so tired. I keep getting to bed later and later because the babies keep going to sleep later and later. I have to have this time to myself or I'll lose my mind. All I do is take care of other people so I really need the break. Later on today I'm supposed to be getting together with my mom to go shopping. I went out with John on Monday, last night I helped my mom with something and tonight I'm going out again. That's more than I get out in a two or three week period generally. Sometimes I feel so isolated and it takes a fantastic effort to get anything done that I don't absolutely have to. That can't be good.
I'm not feeling too bad, just exhausted. I don't want to stay up because of the exhaustion but I don't want to go back to sleep because of the dreams I've been having about the friend. They're recurring and what's really disturbing about them is that I'm starting to really enjoy them. Maybe it isn't what it looks like, maybe something is about to happen to him that's really important. For good or for ill, I could just be seeing something coming.
I don't know.
But I'm too tired to think about it any more tonight.